a summary of this girl + this moment

butterflies. polynomials. the question that only you dared to ask. midnight lifechats. 1AM driving. whiteboard memories. thankfulness. Your Love. happiness. sisters (mine and yours). pumpkin pie. heartbeats. ashes for beauty. differential equations. maybes. music. apple cider. perfect autumn afternoons spent in playful conversation. don't tell me that it's never crossed your mind. the hard choices that brought me here. hazel eyes. bigger than life friendships. new friends. Sunday mornings. fleeting smiles. warm coffee cups. cinnamon sparks. Galois. safety. snuggly scarves. cats. risks. fall(ing).

for the first time in forever

                                                      "It's been so long since I have met you here; 

                                               since I have heard You speak and let You near..."

                                                                     - Starfield, "Alive in This Moment"

I can't name the moment in which everything changed. But driving home tonight, I realized that now I know the answer to the question that has been on my heart recently. 

In today's sermon and study we were asked to consider what risks God has been asking us to take in our lives; what changes we need to make that required taking that leap of faith.

This, tonight, was mine.

It has been a hell of a year. But now I know that despite all my doubts, You never left. And finally I am home, and I find that maybe home is not where I expect, but instead that I am only ever home in You. Now I know that You have brought me (us) here for all the right reasons; of this I am unmistakably certain.

So in this moment, I know that this is where I belong. 

The Witness

It was a routine Sunday morning
Sleepy-eyed, tired hearts
Meeting once again

I was there, paralyzed
By fear and my own weakness
Fighting the demons of my own creation
Until I surrendered myself to Love
Who always makes a way

And you were there
with watchful eyes; cautious as a dove
And before my eyes, you gave yourself up to Dance—
the smallest miracle; the wish of a searching heart
I witnessed you singing with the angels
A testimony to Love
Almost bringing me to tears
At the front of a crowded room

You may not ever know how much it meant to me
To see that one small step from you
But this is my eternal wish
For you

It only took a single moment
To remind me, all over again
that Love is here; alive
and
Love
is
Now